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Dear Donna Death,
I have recently joined you in the ranks of
the undead, and everything they say about the night life is true
--- except for one not-so-little
detail. From all the Dracula movies I used to watch, I never thought your victim
had to have the same blood-type as you, but I found out the hard way! I can't
tell you how many times I've drained a luscious carcass only to have to suddenly
shove the stiff out of the garbage can and spill my spoils into it! A guy can
really go hungry this way! What am I supposed to do --- pick their pocket and
see if they've got a blood-donor's card with the info I need? By the time I
found whether they're type "A", "B", or
"O-Negative", they'd probably get away!
Some friends of mine suggest that I use
the old casual pick-up routine: you know, stroll into a singles' bar, pick out
some fox and start in with the typical banter: "What's your sign? What's
your blood-type? You've heard of French kissing, but I'll bet you've never tried
Romanian kissing," etc.
Can you help me, Donna? I don't have to
tell you it's a . . . er . . . death-or-death situation!
Not Enough Blood to Blush
Dear Don Wan,
Only a nouveau sanguinaire could think of
this fly-by-night approach to good nutrition. Your supper companion should be
very carefully chosen, and proper blood-type is not the only consideration.
Excellent general health and good recuperative properties are also important to
insure as rich and lasting a partnership as possible. The true gourmet would
only dine with an entree of good hygiene and congenial personality.
Donna Death
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